Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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