Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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