Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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