Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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