Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies

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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine

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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.

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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.

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