Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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