Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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