Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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