Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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