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Where does Friday come before Monday?
In the dictionary.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.
Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?
Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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Why was the boy sitting on his watch?
Because he wanted to be on time.
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What is the strongest animal?
A snail because it carries it's home.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?
What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?
Take your foot off his head.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?
It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.
It’s a little fishy.
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