Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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