Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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