Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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