Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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