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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?
Ihop
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Where do horses live?
In the neigh-borhood.
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How do you make a goldfish old?
Take away the g
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
He got Avogadro's number!
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?
Is that you mommy?
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.
That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??
None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?
Silverware.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?
A can of people.
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