Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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