Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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