Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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