Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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