Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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