Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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