Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!

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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.

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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!

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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.

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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.

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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.

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