Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!

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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."

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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.

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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!

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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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