Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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