Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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