Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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