Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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