Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've got you covered!
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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