Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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Who's richer — the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker?

The baker, because he has lots of dough.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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