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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?
Neither, they all burn shorter.
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Why did the drum take a nap?
It was beat.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
On the bottom.
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Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don't work.
There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What did the laywer name his daughter?
Sue.
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?
Great food, no atmosphere.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite.
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How do you make Halloween great again?
By carving a Trumpkin.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?
A woolen jumper
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?
Me-ow
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