Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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