Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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