Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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