Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
Canvas not available.

or


I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

Canvas not available.

or


How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
Canvas not available.

or


Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
Canvas not available.

or


Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
Canvas not available.

or


What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
Canvas not available.

or


Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
Canvas not available.

or


What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed.
Canvas not available.

or


What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
Canvas not available.

or


How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
Canvas not available.

or






© Copyright crapjoke.com 2017-2026