Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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