Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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