Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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