Which day do fish hate?

Fryday

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed

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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper

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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.


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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.

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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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