Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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