Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.

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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.

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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.

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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.

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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop

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