Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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