Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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