Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.

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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!

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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.

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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.

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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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