Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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How many radical feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That isn't funny!
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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