Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.

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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.

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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?

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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon

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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.

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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop

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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.

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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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