Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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