Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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