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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?
Hot, because you can catch cold.
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How is a dog like a telephone?
It has a collar I.D.
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What was the first animal in space?
The cow that jumped over the moon
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?
Mice krispies
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What did one volcano say to the other?
I lava you.
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"
I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?
He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?
With a cowculator.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?
Drinking.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?
Do you want to grab a bite?
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