Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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