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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?
Hot, because you can catch cold.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?
Meat and Democrats!
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite
......... one jar.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?
He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?
Bugs Bunny.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?
He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?
A goat.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?
Deviled eggs.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?
Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?
Sell it and buy a violin
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