Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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