Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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