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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?
Hot, because you can catch cold.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?
In his trunk
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?
An in-car-nation.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?
A Flat Major
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?
As far away as possible.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.
That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How many BBS jokers does it take to tell yet another LBJ?
1,622. One to tell the original joke, and the rest to submit give some minor variation of it! For example:
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?
Because it's two tired!
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.
"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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