Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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