Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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