Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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