Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.

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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!

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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze

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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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