Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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