Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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