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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?
Ask Cheese.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?
Railroad ties.
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What concert costs 45 cents?
50 cent featuring Nickelback
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,
it was a shitzu."
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?
Skeet.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."
The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?
Catfish
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
He got Avogadro's number!
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?
Wet.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?
Quark!
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