Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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