Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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