Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.

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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.

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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.

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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"

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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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