Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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