Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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