Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals

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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.

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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?

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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.

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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.

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