Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.

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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.


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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink

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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them

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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?

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