Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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