Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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