Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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