Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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