Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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