Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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