Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card

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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).

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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.

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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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