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Why are babies good at soccer?
Because they dribble!
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?
You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.
It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?
The Flea Stooges!
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What music does cheese listen to?
R & Brie.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?
So he could grade his eggs.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?
She couldn't control her pupils.
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