Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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