Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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