Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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