Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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