Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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