Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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