Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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