Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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