Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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