Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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A seal walks into a club...
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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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