Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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