Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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