Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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