Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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