Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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