Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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