Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!

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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.

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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.

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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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