Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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