Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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