Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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