Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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