Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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