Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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