Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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