Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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