Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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