Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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