Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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