Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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