Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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