Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu'.

So I went - and I got it.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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