Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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