Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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