Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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