Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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