Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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