Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.

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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.

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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.

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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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