Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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