Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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