Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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