Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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