Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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