Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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