Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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