Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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