Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.

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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.

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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.

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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!

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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over

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