Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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