Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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