Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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