Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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