Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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