Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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