Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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