Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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