Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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