Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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