Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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