Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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