Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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