Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.

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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops

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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.

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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?


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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh

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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!

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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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