Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.

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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.

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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.

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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck

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