Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.

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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.

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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.

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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.

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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.

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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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