Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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