Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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