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Why are there fences around a graveyard?
Because people are dying to get in!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?
A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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Slept like a log last night........
Woke up in the fireplace.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?
Polar Bond.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?
Carlos.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?
An udder failure.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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I just watched a program about beavers.
It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Where do orcas hear music?
Orca-stras
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