Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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