Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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