Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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