Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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