Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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