Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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