Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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