Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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