Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.


GOOD		CRAP

or

A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"


GOOD		CRAP

or

That's not funny!!!


GOOD		CRAP

or

Blue sky at night: day.


GOOD		CRAP

or

Tell it a yolk.


GOOD		CRAP

or

H2O cubed.


GOOD		CRAP

or

In a river bank


GOOD		CRAP

or

Because his feet stink


GOOD		CRAP

or

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.


GOOD		CRAP

or