Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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