Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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