Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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Who's richer — the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker?

The baker, because he has lots of dough.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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