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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?
Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?
To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?
A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?
A hoarse fly!
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Why don't bears wear shoes?
What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing
but you accidentally say Mother.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
Their lips are moving.
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?
A parking meteor!
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?
Parachute school!
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