Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!

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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras

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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!

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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.

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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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