Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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