Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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