Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!

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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow

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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals

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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!

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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.

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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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