Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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