Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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