Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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How many radical feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That isn't funny!
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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