Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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