Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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