Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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