Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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