Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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They stopped a vulture from bringing his rotting carcasses on the plane

but he said "You said I could have two carry on items!"
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