Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!

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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops

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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.

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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.

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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.

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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.

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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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