Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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