Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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