Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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