Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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