Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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