Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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