Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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