Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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How many radical feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That isn't funny!
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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