Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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