Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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