Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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