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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?
They were sitting on the deck!
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What do camels use to hide themselves?
Camelflauge
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What's the best parting gift?
A comb.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?
The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?
All of them
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?
Stuck
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?
Pay him for the pizza
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What kind of dress can't be worn?
Address.
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What's the definition of perfect pitch?
When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.
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