Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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