Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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