Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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