Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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