Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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