Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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