Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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How do you know when its Michael Jacksons bed time ?

When the big hand touches the little hand
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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