Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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