Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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