Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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