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Why did God invent lawyers?
So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?
``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?
A shampoodle
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What did one egg say to the other egg?
Let's get crackin!
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Went to the paper shop -
it had blown away.
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Why did Bach have so many children?
He did not have a stop on his organ.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?
Thorium.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?
To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.
That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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