Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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