Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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