Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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