Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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