Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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