Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang

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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky

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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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