Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends

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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.

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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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