Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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