Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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