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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?
He was looking for Pluto.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?
It went OK2!
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?
Sell it and buy a violin
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".
I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?
After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What room does a ghost not need?
A living room!
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?
It wanted to be a watermelon.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?
She stole his heart.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?
Because her mom would make her take it back.
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?
They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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