Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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