Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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