Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.

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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze

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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.

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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.

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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies

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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.

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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth

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