Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.

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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink

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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.

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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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