Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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