Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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