Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.

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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.

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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.

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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!

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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".

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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras

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