Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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