Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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