Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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