Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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