Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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