Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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