Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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