Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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