Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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