Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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