Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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