Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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