Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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