Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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