Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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