Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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