Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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