Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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