Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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