Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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