Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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