Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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