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Why did the belt go to jail?
It held up a pair of pants.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?
A sandwich!
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?
It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?
Railroad ties.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,
I just can't think of one atm.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?
Bison
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?
Because it's in the ground state.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?
One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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