Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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