Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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