Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!

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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?

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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.

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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.

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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.

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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over

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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.

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