Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!

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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.

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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.

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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.


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