Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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