Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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