Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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