Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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