Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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