Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need. (Comment: BLEAH!)
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Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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