Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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