Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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