Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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