Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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