Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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