Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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