Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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