Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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Dorian Gray Jokes,

they never get old!
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