Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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