Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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