Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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