Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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