Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.


GOOD		CRAP

or

What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.


GOOD		CRAP

or

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.


GOOD		CRAP

or

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil


GOOD		CRAP

or

The fear of Santa Claus.


GOOD		CRAP

or

The sound of Mew-sic


GOOD		CRAP

or

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."


GOOD		CRAP

or

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!


GOOD		CRAP

or

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."


GOOD		CRAP

or

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four


GOOD		CRAP

or