Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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