Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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