Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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