Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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