Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.
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A seal walks into a club...
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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