Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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